Motivational Advent Calendar: Door Number 9 #PersonalDevelopment #Forgiveness

Welcome to your Motivate Me Advent Blog Calendar!

Throughout December, I shall be opening a new advent door on a personal development technique or tip that you might wish to try that day or save for the New Year.

Door Number Nine: Forgive

We’ve all experienced something that we needed to forgive, or ask forgiveness for. I’m not asking you to be judgemental on yourself or others; I merely want you to think about areas of your life where forgiveness can offer you the most peace.

If someone has done you wrong or spoken ill of you behind your back, its human nature to sulk and feel betrayed by that person, but most often the person who has wronged you is oblivious to the fact and is happily living their life.

Who is being harmed? You are! Allow yourself to forgive their actions (I’m not asking you to forget what they did) and free yourself from the heartache and stress of it all.

I spent many months feeling angry and upset when a friend of mine betrayed me. I’m fully aware of what she said and who she spoke to, and I also know that other people were involved, but I drove myself crazy thinking about it. It was my CBT therapist who made me recognise what I was doing – ‘Do you really want that person in your life?’ and ‘You’re only hurting yourself by going over and over it in your head.’

It was a split second decision to forgive that person for what they had done and recognise that we were now following very different paths. As soon as I offered up forgiveness, I stopped thinking about it, stopped worrying about it, and most importantly, I got on with living my life and being happy.

Not only do we need to forgive others, but we also need to offer ourselves that same forgiveness. Permit yourself to make mistakes – we’re only human! We can learn so much from all the things that go wrong.

Where can you offer forgiveness?


  1. Much as I appreciate the wisdom behind this one, I must confess I find forgiving people a tricky one. I can be a real toddler if someone crosses me. I don’t sulk. , and outwardly things return to normal, but the indescretion can fester somewhere deep inside,, only to resurface later. Work in progress.

    1. I can totally resonate with that, Julia. Definitely not easy to do at all. I lived for years with that festering inside and I often wonder if I didn’t manifest a few physical ailments because of it!

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